Friday, July 18, 2014

Simplify and Win Your Conversations About the Weather! (Guest Post)

The Polar Jet, posing in January 2014 (http://earth.nullschool.net/)
This post was written and paid for by the Polar Jet Stream, which is the concentrated band of strong winds aloft, generally found between 35 and 60 degrees north latitude. 


People love talking about the weather, especially when it gets exciting. It's the most common topic of conversation in North America.

And I say, go for it.

Recent fad terms (Polar Vortex, anyone?) are enticing, but fail to explain the weather comprehensively and accurately. 

Do you want to bring a scientifically-shaky explanation of what's going to to your weather conversations? One that breaks down upon examination and confounds the very scientists who supposedly understand it? One that is accurate practically never and leaves people with more questions than answers? 

I didn't think so.

Or, do you want to be armed with an explanation that is simple, efficient, and correct almost every time?

Of course you do!

If you want to win your conversations and leave people with no doubt that you know your weather, then look no further than me, the most influential, persistent, and reliable large-scale-weather-explaining mechanism out there.

I am the Polar Jet Stream. I am all the explanation you need.*
  
Nothing else has my track record. Take a look at these credentials:
  • Led 100% of continental-scale cold air outbreaks and heat waves in the Northern Hemisphere since beginning of current landmass configuration
  • Successfully energized or aided development of >99% of all Northern Hemisphere extratropical cyclones
  • Steered billions of transient weather systems (I stopped counting eons ago, literally!)
  • Responded to and integrated seamlessly with important planetary, hemispheric, and continental-scale perturbations like El Niño, Global Warming, volcanic eruptions and the Polar Vortex. Even under their influence, I am your best bet for making sense of the weather!
  • 99.999999% uptime, guaranteed, meaning I'm virtually always there!
Sure, El Niño, Global Warming, and the Polar Vortex can explain plenty of weather phenomena. But if you rely on them out of context, you will be a laughingstock for years, or even decades to come.

Don't let that happen to you. 

Make sure you get it right. Fortify your conversations by understanding the most frequently-referenced and most trusted name in the Atmosphere. Me. The Polar Jet Stream.
 
You can find me on a weather map by looking for a band of strong 250-millibar (mb) winds. Those are the winds about 6-6.5 miles off the ground. Sometimes, commercial maps will just spell out exactly where I am. (In truth, I have a broader definition, but don't worry about that!)

Once you have found me, all you need is your location, and these simple rules of thumb will work 99% of the time!
  • When it's mild or warm for that time of year, it's because I am to your north.
    • If it is very warm or hot, I am way to your north. Just look at my average position, up in Canada, during eight significant heat waves in the Upper Midwest, when temperatures in Minneapolis were 95-105 F.

  • When it's cool for that time of year, it's because I am to your south. 
    • If it is very cold, I am way to your south. Check out my average position during eight significant cold outbreaks in the Upper Midwest, when temperatures in Minneapolis were between -20 and -30.

  • Lastly, if find yourself in an inclement weather pattern, then I am in your general vicinity. Not necessarily overhead; nearby will do! And watch out if I make a sharp U-shape just to your west.

That's it! No messy Polar Vortex. No confusing El Niño. No politically charged Global Warming. Just a simple explanation that's accurate more than 99% of the time.  Find me, and understand your weather.

It's that simple!

Watch a loop of the last 6-6.5 days, compare it to what you have experienced, and judge for yourself!

Listen to what these satisfied users have to say:

 North America's major weather changes in Autumn are first detected in Alaska, when the Polar Jet dives toward the Bering Strait. The Polar Jet OWNS Alaska.  - Dave Snider
I must say, after getting swept up in the Polar Vortex current, my husband and I were skeptical that we would ever find another believable explanation for the weather. But then, during a stormy period in May, we pulled up some simple charts, and sure enough, the Polar Jet Stream was practically sitting on top of us! The next week it got hot and we saw that it was about 500 miles to our north. It has been spot-on ever since. Thank you, Polar Jet Stream! - Tamara and Gene Crenshaw    
After 16 years in Atlanta and now back home in Minnesota, I am reminded just how wide-ranging and extreme the weather can be, all thanks to the Polar Jet Stream! - Daniel Dix
If you live in the northern hemisphere, north of 35 degrees, there is no better single mechanism for understanding and explaining your weather than the Polar Jet Stream. I cannot recommend familiarizing yourself with it enough! - Kenny Blumenfeld

If you want to put your best foot forward and impress your friends and colleagues with your commanding weather knowledge, drop those trendy explanations that will make you look foolish. Get on board with best explanation on the market: Me. The Polar Jet Stream.

Act Now!

*Excluding tropical weather.

4 comments:

  1. 12Z Sunday analysis...hope that whopper doesn't get initialized!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Excellent article. This past winter, for some unknown reason, the polar vortex was dropped down into the troposphere by the media (and even some meteorologists!!!) and blamed for all of the cold air outbreaks, snow storms, and well, everything. Meanwhile, the poor polar jet stream, and associated cut-off lows, was up there wondering how it just got forgotten and eliminated. We can only hope that the polar vortex gets to go back to where it lives and the polar jet stream can get back to controlling who gets cold air and who doesn't.

    ReplyDelete